I Am A Sucker

Yeah. That’s tie silk from Guss Woolens. I might have promised to make one for someone.  Why? Because I’m a *sucker*

For those who might be new to Miss Celie’s Pants. I made the fool mistake of making a veritable stack of seven-fold silk ties as a Christmas gift for my then boyfriend (the Cop)  in 2008. We broke up less than a month later. I am now ok with the demise of the relationship. But, I am still pretty f-ing mad about those damn ties.

I warned the Vegan about the Boyfriend Sweater Curse. I told him what happened the last time I made ties for someone. He says he doesn’t believe in curses. He’s in no rush. But, he’d like a tie. I will of course drag this out as long as humanly possible.

The thing is, he’s super sweet. I will spare you many of the saccharine details.  I will say that while I was working on my Butterick dress yesterday, he cleaned my kitchen. My Kitchen. I wanted to roll around and do dirty things on the floor like eat off it. I am just not thoughtful or useful like that. I can pretty much do two things for people. Either I cook for you or I sew for you.

So, yeah. It’s easier than a shirt. The fabric is beautiful. And, I my friends, am a sucker.


  1. Well, I wish you good luck with the ties and with Vegan when he receives them. But hey, don’t think negative (said someone who’s also 30-something, single, and full of bad experiences and memories she’d rather forget). Oh, and it’s OK to be a sucker from time to time ;-).

      • Indeed, Cidell, I think I’d sew for cleaning almost anytime. Also, I’d definitely sew for wall-painting prep. The actual painting I like. Such a sense of accomplishment once you finally get to it.

        From here I’d say you’re not exhibiting sucker behavior, nor are you inviting the curse of the crafted gift. He wants the product, he actually asked for it, it’s handiwork you are skilled AND enjoy, and he’s neither sitting around waiting for it nor, it seems, feeling grabby about the time you’ll need to make it. Just make sure he understands that, while you’ll be glad to (eventually) make him a tie, Sewing for Others time does not count as Sewing for Self time, and, as it is not something of your own conception, it only partly overlaps with Creative Outlet time. One must have Creative Outlet Time in order to stay sane. It just takes different forms for different people. Too many unhappy people haven’t found theirs yet, or (more of us, I think) aren’t good enough at making time for it.

  2. Aww make’m a tie. I am a sucker for anyone who will clean up for me and wow cleaning while I am sewing, A dream!! Hopefully the curse will be broken this time. What can I say I am a romantic at heart. LOL!!!

  3. No, you’re not a sucker. You’re just nice and have a nice boyfriend worth wrestling a tie for. 🙂

  4. DO NOT make the tie! The vegan cleans(!!) as well as sounding like the nicest guy on earth. I urge you not to tempt fate – at least not until he “puts a ring on it”.
    Seriously, you are one lucky gal and he’s just as lucky to have you, my best wishes to you both.

  5. “Do dirty things like eat off it…”
    Thanks, I needed the laugh! And for the record, you’re no sucker and too smart to believe in curses. Make the man a tie. 1 tie. He cleaned your kitchen for pete’s sake. Your KITCHEN. He deserve’s a tie!

  6. Wait wait wait – is the Vegan supportive of silk? If the silk is bombyx, the moths are stifled (killed) so that the silk can be reeled off the cocoon without breaks. I had a vegan friend who was against wool clothing. Even though he understood that sheep are not hurt during the shearing process, etc etc etc, he was still opposed to it because he did not support domestication of animals, he viewed it as a form of exploitation.

  7. Considering that the vegan boyfriend did clean your kitchen, making the tie would be an appreciation gift from you. Perhaps he cleaned the kitchen because he wanted you to make him a tie, in any event it was willing to do something in exchange for the tie. I don’t think it’s a bad deal.

  8. My mom could not believe that I cleaned my then boyfriend’s house before we were married. That was her definition of giving it away. (But his roommate’s girlfriend was, so really I would’ve been a total shlep if I hadn’t helped her out). Just say no to the smoking jacket, though!

  9. Hmmmm…. I’m on the fence on this one. ok, I say go for it, but limit it to 1 tie. That way, if he wants more, he’ll know that more (a ring) has to be in the works or on your finger. 😉

    • Actually, when he brought it up, I just waved my ring finger at him and told him I don’t make anything for anyone anymore without a ring on my finger. He just laughed.

  10. Make him the damm tie even if just to prove the non-validitiy of the curse! ….but make him keep it at your house!

  11. I would love to make a tie for my husband and 4 boys. What pattern do you use or where can I find the instructions. I think this sounds so cool. I would love for you to make him a tie he deserves it if he cleaned your kitchen! You are not a sucker just a kind soul!

  12. Well heck, I think he deserves ONE tie for cleaning up the kitchen! I wouldn’t think they’d be too difficult to make (I could be very wrong on this), so I think it’s a nice thing to do. I never made a tie for my old boyfriend, but I bought him a lovely Hermes tie WHICH HE NEVER WORE!!! I shoulda got it back when we broke up . . . .

    • I bought a man a sweater that he never wore! It was J.Crew and I’m still mad about that too!

  13. Aw, make the tie. And BTW, when you started mentioning him cleaning the kitchen and doing dirty things on the floor, I was thinking of something else entirely! But then, maybe you were too, but your mom reads your blog! LOL

  14. This is a man who understands foreplay. oops, wait, I did NOT say that.

  15. I’ll weigh in with the ‘Make him the tie.” It is easier than a shirt — which I’m making the dh right now. I waited 39 years for him — and he cleans kitchens, does laundry, vacuums…….

    • The shirts scare me! I’d have to learn plackets and everything. This, I got.

  16. Now that’s a great guy! So glad you’ve made it to that stage where you can sew and he can otherwise occupy himself – and I can think of no better way he could have occupied himself.

  17. Girl, that’s definitely the kind of foreplay that turns me on. It’s the simple, thoughtful things that will get you every time. Make him two ties for me. He sounds like a keeper.

  18. LOL. My husband cleans kitchens and I’ve had him a lot of years. I’ve never made him a tie though. One tie? That’s a lot of fabric for one tie.

  19. Formalities out of the way – I LOVE your blog! He sounds like a potential keeper. Make him a great meal and save the tie for a wedding anniversary gift 🙂

  20. And when are you making this tie? Remember that black backing silk I made my mom buy from India for you? *Blushing* – I still have it, never mailed it out. (I’m sorry. I’m dreadful, really. No good excuse.) Anyway, I can actually drop it in the mail, if you want it (if no good for ties, there’s still enough to make a dress, 2 yards, I think.) Or, if the tie project isn’t going to get started until Montreal, I’ll bring it to that.


  21. Oh, honey, a man who will clean your kitchen for you? He’s a keeper! And I don’t believe in curses – make him a tie. 🙂

  22. You sew while he’s cleaning your kitchen, that sounds great. He understands your need to sew from time to time, even when he’s around. Great guy! Make him a tie. Don’t believe in curses.

  23. I’m for making a tie, too. Can’t believe he cleaned the kitchen… do you have to ask? Haha… I have to ask my husband for everything otherwise it’s ESPN for him. 🙂 I have yet to sew him something though… hmm… will need to investigate on making a tie.

  24. Looks like he is well trained. Perhaps you had better make the tie! But just one for now, don’t get carried away….

  25. I say make the tie. This is the way you express affection. Other people do it by giving massages or cooking meals or cleaning kitchens. There’s nothing wrong with doing something nice for someone. As for the curse, if it’s not meant to be then isn’t it better to find out now?

  26. I think I’d rather make a tie than spring clean my kitchen! It all sounds good, you’ll be going vegan soon….

  27. I don’t know about the tie or the vegan (although I’ll make a tie right now for anyone who cleans my kitchen floor), but that orange stripe up there in the photo would make some kickass hot pants.

  28. You do what feels right. And one tie is not at stack. And you are not a sucker, you are just being nice and in love and still in lust.

  29. OK, so I will be the lone dissenter. I took ONE LOOK at the title and the photo of tie silk and yelled, “NOOOOOOOOO!!!” at my computer.

    That was my gut reaction. My logical reaction says that one tie is not too bad – if you want to make one. You have to really want to make something, otherwise it’s a chore. In my mind a clean kitchen equals a nice meal. (That’s just selfish ol’ me not wanting to share my premium sewing time with anyone.)

  30. Oh sweetie, I have ‘sucker’ tattooed across my forehead!!! But luckily I met someone as naive as me, and 6 years later we’re still as happy as clams (and who ever took a poll on the status of a clam’s emotions?).
    Your Vegan sounds like a nice guy so go ahead and make him a tie!

  31. I made an ex-boyfriend a shirt and also knitted him a jumper. He was a potter/artist and made me a few lovely pots. These had nothing to do with why we broke up. Your boyfriend sounds lovely, I wouldn’t believe the curse. He’d probably appreciate the fact you made them for him. I would love to make my husband a shirt but he honestly wouldn’t care/appreciate it.

  32. Girl make the tie!!! He’ll love it, it sounds wonderful…giving something you made for someone you’re feeling and they appreciate it! It’s bliss, get yours

  33. I waited until I was two years married to knit my husband a hat, and that was only because he asked for it. [I reckon the boyfriend sweater curse is more related to unasked for gifts tho!] Also – as a Vegan,

    If nothing else – don’t let this patient,nice restaurant going, kitchen cleaning, daughter looking after, flower sending, man go!

    • Luckily, he’s more of a vegan along the ‘healthier’ lines than the ‘I love animals’ line. So, he’s got nothing against silk / wool / leather

  34. I once made a quilt for a boyfriend. It was beautiful. Navy paisley and marron. Then he cheated on me and found a new girlfriend. New girlfriend wanted to THROW THE QUILT AWAY!!! Twenty years later, I wonder what ever happened to that quilt. However, I do think a nice tie would be a nice thank you for a clean kitchen.

    • I would be so mad!! Then again, I wanted the ties back from the Cop! At the time, I would see him on TV wearing my ties (after we broke up). Made my blood boil, LOL.

  35. Well, since he cleaned your kitchen, you can say that the tie is a thank you gift.

  36. I’m sorry 😉 I was snickering by the 3rd word – LOL !

    But if the man will come visit and clean your kitchen while you sew, he definitely deserves ‘something’ – make the tie !!!

    My DH does everything but the laundry (& c’mon, really, the machines do all the work) and in 24 years has only rec’d 2 knit sweaters (a lotta work in those sweaters), 2 pairs of sewn sleep pants and 1 shirt. I really ought to even out the score a bit. He has just expressed the tiniest bit of interest in a pair of socks…

  37. Girl, make that man his ties. He did clean your kitchen. I for one know all about the sweater curse. How about I was in the middle of knitting a sweater for my now husband and had to stop(I found out at knitting group). You know he wasn’t too pleased about that. I pacified him with hats, scarves, socks. Flash forward, I took the started sweater on our honeymoon and he finally got it for our first Christmas together as a married couple.

  38. Any man who cleaned my kitchen could have a tie, a shirt, gosh – anything he wanted! You can bet I’d make him all the ties he wanted. (I do have to say, Mr. Hunting Creek cooks and cleans. That’s one reason why we are married. 🙂 )

  39. My husband knows that when he cleans the kitchen I get all kinds of thrilled and well, it pays off quite well for him. The man deserves at least a tie. Maybe more. 😉

  40. I agree with most other posters, one tie! How sweet that he cleaned your kitchen, that’s some husband material 🙂 BTW, he’s not Vegan, as Veganism is an ethical lifestyle. Strict vegetarians on the other hand, also avoid consuming animal products/by-products, for reasons including health. I hope he continues to be a great guy, and best wishes for for the future!

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